Rabbi Ed Friedman reminds us that there are at least three universal laws regarding children of all families. These universal laws transcend all cultural and sociological characteristics:
1.) children who work through the natural problems of maturing with the least amount of emotional or physical residue are those whose parents have made them least important to their own salvation. (Maturity = defined as the willingness to take responsibility for one's own emotional well being and destiny.)
2.) children rarely succeed in rising above the maturity level of their parents and this principle applies to all mentoring, healing, or administrative relationships
3. a third universal, which also applies to all leaders, is that parents can't produce change in a troubling child, no matter how caring, savvy, or intelligent they may be, until they become completely and totally fed-up with their child's behavior
Failure of Nerve: Leadership in the Age of the Quick Fix
by Edwin Friedman
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
Isn't it also true that a child will emerge into adulthood assuming the same level of differientiation as they're parents?...a challenge to us both as children and as parents.
ReplyDeletei could learn to spell - THEIR
ReplyDeleteShitz, Sara.......that' true and what a challenge for us parents to get our act together. You and Ryan still have lots of time...I just hope and pray that Peter, John, Nick and Annie got what they needed as they grow into adulthood. Apparently we have about 25 years with them, before their brains fully mature and stop growing. Shame...
ReplyDeleteO'